Zoom Meeting summary
The group met to discuss and demonstrate an empathy circle focused on bridging political divides, with participants including Edwin (facilitator), Jillian, Kevin, Lou, and Jodie. The session explored how empathy circles can help build mutual understanding and trust between people with differing viewpoints, with participants sharing personal experiences about using empathy in academic and professional settings. The discussion highlighted challenges around vulnerability, timing, and facilitation in empathy circles, while also touching on the importance of play and physical activities as icebreakers before difficult conversations. The participants agreed on the value of recording empathy circle sessions to demonstrate their effectiveness to others who might be hesitant to participate.
The group discussed the importance of empathy in bridging divides and fostering understanding between individuals with differing perspectives. Jodie shared her research on finding balance between holding personal values and being open to others' experiences, while Kevin highlighted the need for empathy in his work with students at Northwestern. Jillian presented her PhD research on the cognitive processes involved in civil discourse and depolarization through empathy. Edwin described his efforts to promote empathy through empathy circles and planned activities with the Empathy Tent at political conventions and college campuses. The group agreed on the potential of physical activities and shared experiences to build connections and facilitate dialogue. They expressed interest in collaborating further and exploring the concept of empathy in various contexts.
Jillian and Kevin discussed the concept of "performative empathy," where individuals focus excessively on a single cause to the exclusion of other aspects of life, potentially leading to an overemphasis that may not align with true empathy. Kevin shared his personal experience at the University of Michigan, where he realized that students were using empathy as a performative tool to express ideological beliefs rather than genuine understanding, which he found damaging and indicative of a lack of true empathy.
The group discussed the effectiveness of the empathy circle approach in facilitating difficult conversations. Lou highlighted the importance of structured timing, mutual speaking opportunities, and slowing down the process to create a fair and supportive environment. Jillian and Lou agreed on the value of establishing connections before conversations, with Lou sharing her practice of starting circles with personal sharing. The discussion concluded with Edwin considering ways to integrate play before empathy circles, though he was primarily in a listening role.
The group discussed activities to enhance empathy circles, with Jillian sharing examples of group bonding exercises like a cloth-flipping game and a bodyweight exercise that foster connection. Edwin recalled a successful UC Berkeley empathy tent event from 8-9 years ago that incorporated various playful activities. Kevin shared his experience with a graduate program at Northwestern, highlighting how diversity initiatives often lack meaningful empathy and viewpoint diversity in practice, leading to unproductive conversations when different perspectives are shared.
The group discussed the challenges and benefits of vulnerability in empathy circles, with Jillian expressing difficulty sharing personal stories while Lou and Edwin explored the concept of meeting participants where they are. They agreed that trust builds over time in empathy circles, and pressure should not be applied for participants to open up. Kevin shared his interest in bringing empathy circle practices to Northwestern University, and the group discussed potential strategies to encourage participation, including sharing the recorded session to alleviate fears. Edwin mentioned upcoming facilitator training in April and offered support for future circles.
The meeting focused on the importance of empathy circles in fostering open and respectful communication. Edwin Rutsch emphasized accepting people where they are and building trust over time. Lou highlighted the effectiveness of starting discussions on the difficulty of addressing sensitive topics, such as racism. The conversation also covered the mutuality of empathy, ensuring it's not one-sided, and the role of facilitators in maintaining trust and reflection. The group discussed potential applications at Northwestern University, including political empathy circles, and the need for facilitator training to handle challenging conversations effectively.
[ ] @Edwin Rutsch - Send the recording of the UC Berkeley empathy tent event to the group (share recording with meeting participants)
[ ] @Edwin Rutsch - Plan and organize empathy tent deployments at the upcoming Democratic Convention and at UC Berkeley (prepare logistics and outreach for those events)
[ ] Follow up with Edwin and other participants after the meeting to pursue ideas for campus play-based projects and potential collaboration at Northwestern
[ ] Connect with Jillian and Kevin after the meeting to discuss possible collaboration on play/movement and outreach projects
[ ] Draft and submit a short article or research contribution about play or related research for the Substack (Inner Workout) as a potential contributor
Edwin Rutsch emphasizes the importance of accepting people as they are, whether they choose to be vulnerable or not.
Lou discusses the benefits of the facilitator being a participant, helping to set a norm of openness and listening well.
Edwin adds that the facilitator can set the tone for the quality of the circle, making it personal or not.
Lou mentions the difficulty in getting young people to talk to each other and suggests starting with the difficulty of discussing difficult topics.
Lou shares her strategy of starting empathy circles on difficult topics like racism by discussing the difficulty of having such conversations.
Edwin agrees, noting that the opening question can frame the conversation and make it more approachable.
Lou highlights the importance of mutuality in empathy, ensuring that empathy is not one-sided but inclusive of everyone in the circle.
Edwin summarizes the criticism of empathy as selective, emphasizing the need for mutual empathy.
Edwin discusses the importance of framing the question to set the tone for the circle, whether it be intellectual or personal.
Lou reiterates that the question influences the direction of the circle and can make it more personal.
Edwin shares his experience that trust builds over time, allowing participants to become more open and vulnerable.
Lou agrees, stating that pressuring people to be open can have the opposite effect, and accepting them where they are is more empathic.
Edwin mentions that in some circumstances, a little pressure might be necessary to encourage openness, like in political dialogues.
Lou and Edwin discuss the importance of not pressuring people to be open, as it can lead to tension and discomfort.
Lou asks if pressuring people is the right approach, and Edwin reiterates that accepting people where they are is more effective.
Edwin suggests that the question posed in the circle can influence the depth of the conversation and the level of trust built.
Lou and Edwin discuss the importance of the facilitator's role in ensuring that the speaker feels heard, especially in difficult conversations.
Lou highlights the need for co-facilitation in challenging circles to maintain the reflector's role and prevent distortion.
Edwin mentions the importance of keeping people on track in terms of time and ensuring fairness in the conversation.
Lou and Edwin discuss the need for facilitator training and the basics of the empathy circle process.
Speaker 4 expresses interest in bringing empathy circles to Northwestern and discusses the challenges of getting people to participate.
Lou suggests showing the recording of the circle to those who are afraid to participate to help them see the value.
Speaker 4 plans to do political empathy circles with colleagues and reach out for input and support.
Edwin offers to hold more circles and support the process, including training others in the facilitation of empathy circles.
Lou expresses gratitude for being invited and meeting the participants, highlighting the importance and smart approach of the work.
Speaker 2 shares their experience as a "yapper" and the challenge of being a silent listener in the empathy circle.
Speaker 4 discusses the need for basic listening skills in society and the potential for empathy circles to address this need.
Edwin and Lou express excitement about the potential for empathy circles at Northwestern and the importance of leading by example.